For the crab mixture: In a large bowl combine the 2 c. cracker crumbs and cream, 1 egg, all of the seasonings and herbs, pimentos, and the juice of 1 small lemon.

On a cutting board with a knife cut the jalapeno into small strips and then mince it finely. Slice the green onion (white and green parts) finely and add both vegetables into the bowl. Mix and toss this well.

Before adding the crab meat, toss it into another bowl and pick over it finely looking for any bits of shell. When you are sure it is clean you may squeeze out any excess water into the sink and add it to the bowl of cracker mixture.

Add the chopped imitation crab. Using your hands mix in the crab meat. At this point, I like to freeze the mixture for about a half-hour or chill for several hours or overnight. This is not necessary but makes it much easier to handle and stuff the jalapenos.

Gather the jalapenos and the crab, using a spoon scoop a heaping ¼ c. of crab into the jalapeno and mold it well. It should look like a giant egg. Don’t be afraid to really stuff a tall tower of crab mixture in there! Reserve and repeat with the rest of the jalapenos. Freeze for 15 minutes while you put together the breading station.

For the breading station: you will need 2 large plates and a bowl for the egg wash. Pour the flour onto a plate, the panko bread crumbs onto another plate, and crack the 2 eggs into the bowl. Whish in about ¼ c. of water to thin out the eggs and create an egg wash.

When the jalapenos and crab mixture are firm from being chilled in the freezer, take one at a time and dip the jalapeno side into the egg mixture and then into the flour on all sides (including the crab side). This is necessary to give the flour something to stick to besides the slick jalapeno skin. The flour will adhere to the crab mixture easily but the jalapeno side takes that extra step.

From the flour plate, you will dip the entire egg back into the egg wash, and then into the panko bread crumbs. Coat it well and apply gentle pressure to make sure the breading is tight. Place back on the plate and repeat with all of the jalapenos.

Freeze the jalapenos for a full 30 minutes while you heat the oil.

For the cooking- Heat the full quart of oil in a medium saucepan at medium-high heat. Using a thermometer bring the oil to around 340-350 degrees. Place a cooling rack down on a cookie sheet to collect your cooked shark eggs or a paper towel-lined plate works just as well.

Pro Tip**I like to cut my lemons into wedges and prepare a bowl of Kick in the Pants Ranch before I start to fry so they are ready to enjoy as soon as they are golden brown!

One at a time take a shark egg out and gently place it into the oil. Fry them making sure to maintain heat above 325 degrees. One egg takes about 5 minutes and should come to a beautiful golden brown. Once you think you’ve got a handle on frying one at a time you can add one more to the hot oil. I never fry over two at a time because they cool down the temperature of the oil making the shark egg greasy.

Finish off the remaining shark eggs and serve hot with lots of freshly squeezed lemon and ranch dressing.